Let's just say this is hella difficult.

62 on my biology test, come on shanae. I'm so done with procrastinating. I need to get it together. Ughhh.

--PointBlankk

And he even said that we shud get married. *sighs* and then kept quotin my letter to him, and its been 7 1/2 months, almost a year. Almost my bday. My longest relationship ever.

I hope it jux lasts so much longer.
--PointBlankk

Being MIA

So I went to go see my bf on friday.... Well saturday morning and let's just say, I miss him already.

Labor day was wack and right now I'm in my state of mind of, being scared to get cheated on again. I kno wen I was lil I always said that I wud fight him and break up wit him and not look baq but I realize that I love him toooooooo much to let things like that get to me as long as I'm able to trust him still (which is hard) and work thru it I'm fine. But its always a limit and a breaking point. Idk sometimes, I feel like giving up or just giving in.

Its still the same disappointment, still the same shit. Except he not creepin, well... Hard to tell wen I can't see him everyday and barely get a phone call. *sighs*.

Then wen I really wanna see him something happens, idk y I love him so much.

Oh yea, I moved into my new dorm friday to my suitenates seem cool but... Strange lol.

Ughhh but charles. Idk y I love him so much I'd do anything for him. Give him the world (not exactly) ill jux do a lot. And he tlkn bout airforce. I gtta laugh at that lmao. He cud get in, but idk if he willin to wait for me like I'm willing to wait for him.
--PointBlankk

At S-U

im at Winston Salem State University and I sooooo miss my boyfriend and my mom and can u believe it, Joy. lol. Mann i been here for 4 days and no friends and dude, my new years resolution is not going so well in the Shy department and im tired of being asked to speak up when this is the way i talk. what u want me to do scream. here are some pics.

So that is the dorm room and stuff (most of that is my roommates. im a broke college student and she not). and ME! and i really miss my boyfriend. I feel like the guys here are wayyyy cuter than they were at Fay State and im like so dead serious because just, wow. They are cute. I guess its true, further north u go , cuter they get. I know New York got some fine men.

Well....

Lets just hope by the end of this year everything goes right and i get engaged to the love of my life. ........ I doubt thats going to happen. Thats months from now and i cant wait till Refund and i get the license plate on my car, im going to see my boyfriend for that weekend and chill out. then go home and just visit. lol.

I got plans to do with that car once its registered but that wont be till like, 2 months from now. If you on my dads schedule cuz he always wanna do shit last minute. i might not be home labor day weekend. *sighs* i wish Charles would have called today. he knows i miss him. Ill wait tho. ill tlk to him on the computer till my phone gets turned back on so its whateva.

Nite Blogg. I got an 8 o'clock class in the morning.

(SN: My classes. I hate them. [Mondays&WEDNESDAYS&Fridays] except my Psychology class. that lady is funny and im sooo ready for it. I have no idea where my Rehab class is at though. Oh well. i guess. ill figure it out later. i need to go to sleep im dead tired.)

What does it mean to have a pic of ya ex gf on ya page and then say bestie and then take her off.

Idk if I made the right decision with getting back with him.

I still have doubts in my head about him and his securities (as he says he is but I dnt think he still wants to be tied down with one girl).

I really dnt kno, I wish I did kno. Ughh. Complicated. School next thursday. I wanna chill wit him before I leave and my financial aid still hasn't went thru. Life is hard.

--PointBlankk

Booty!

The episode of boondocks wen the guy says suttin bout Booty. They got it from a Lock up episode. I jux realized that omg.

Omg. He jux said. "I like u. I want u. Either we can do this the easy way or the hard way". Ohmygoshhh.

Like, they got it from that and the dude look just like him like woooow. Crack lips and everything. Lol.
--PointBlankk

Fckd up.

U kno they left me and Joy here to starve while they go get sumthin to eat. My sister wanted to go to Olive Garden and she only had enuff to pay for us 3 and I wasn't gnna buy Joy food so I said that I wud pay for myself and u get Joy food as long as I get to use the car and my mom looked at me wit a "no" face and my sister said no. How bout they both go and me and Joy stay here. So they left to go to olive garden and aint shit to eat in the house and I haven't ate or had anything to drink all day so all I said was wateva and ima go to sleep but idk wen.
--PointBlankk